Archive - Jun 10, 2011


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Memo to Joan Walsh, Mary Elizabeth Williams, Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachmann, and some arbitrary concept around the blatant political misuse of survey data: YOU ARE DUMB.

Wienergate. The 2012 GOP primary. The war on public employees. Is there anything that connects these other than their innate stupidity? Connecting themes are, in many cases, in the eye of the beholder on SPASTIC TOPIC MONKEY FRIDAY.

Anthony Wiener's wife is pregnant. Which has led two writers at Salon - Joan Walsh, who is usually smart, and Mary Elizabeth Williams, who is usually not, to declare that this CHANGES EVERYTHING and turns Wiener from a somewhat harmless horndog into a villain who must resign immediately for the good of the country. This is a sentiment that has been echoed in the general media, and it is deeply fucking stupid.

If Wiener's been flirting online, as he claims, for five years, and his wife is a few months pregnant, that tells me that whatever he has been doing with pictures of T-PAW online, T-PAW's physical location has remained within the bounds of matrimony, and apparently fairly recently. Here's Walsh:

"It was bad enough that he cyber-cheated on his wife, and behaved so recklessly that the whole world found out about it. Dragging her through any more humiliation, while she's pregnant, would be cruelty. He can't do it. Weiner has to resign. He owes it to his family."

Not once does Walsh actually explain why the additional humiliation that would come from not resigning would be OK if she wasn't pregnant, but is so wrong now that she apparently is. She just states it in the most knee-jerk, shockingly anti-feminist way possible. It's no more humiliating for her because she's pregnant. Humiliation's not like a folic acid deficiency - it doesn't harm fetuses, for fuck's sake. It's just like some weird protective instinct cut in and shut off what's normally a functioning brain.

Since Williams doesn't have a functioning brain to shut off in the first place, hers is of course even worse. I'll spare you most of it, but point out that she accuses Wiener of "extramarital dalliances" which, because she separates them from the "inappropriate conversations" he's admitted to, means she's just making shit up.

Headline from the Huffington Post:

"Palin, Bachmann Camps Feud Over Who Gets To Be Defined As A 'Serious' Candidate"

Ladies, ladies. Don't fight. You're both ridiculous candidates.

You don't see shit and vomit fighting over which one is the unpleasant one, do you? I know you're probably both cranky about Fox News putting one of your pictures with the other one's name by accident, but it's not worth getting into a protracted fight over market share. You've both done so much to increase the audience of gullible, idiotic, right-wing suckers. You can share the pie, lose and/or ultimately decide not to seek the nomination, and if worse comes to worse, put a big tape line across the country and not cross it during your respective big-ticket speaking tours.

And in the "war on public employees" front, a new study came out last week that claimed that over 70,000 federal workers make more money than the governor of the state they work in. Do I even have to unpack how unremarkable this news is? Fine.

First, perspective. There are 2.8 million federal employees. Which means two and a half percent of all federal employees make more than an arbitrary, variable benchmark - the gubernatorial pay in the state where they work.

But why is that the benchmark? The governor is at the top of the state government. Federal employees work for the federal government. The federal government is, to point out the obvious, BIGGER than any one state government. Plus, nobody runs for governor for the fucking money. They do it to pad their resume and help their careers. They're like interns, really. Some of them even quit after a couple of years, figuring they've gotten what they needed. And as interns go, they're paid really, really well.

This study doesn't say anything alarming at all if you think about it. Which makes it perfect fodder for Republicans in the current political climate, where nobody thinks about anything. I wonder how many of those 70,000+ workers are pregnant?