Archive - Feb 2, 2012

Random Retro Week: Day 4

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YAD is taking a week off to recharge the batteries, but to keep my brainmeats from atrophying in the meantime, I've selected ten dates at random with the awesome random date generator at random.org, and I'll post two Classic YAD links each day with a bit of commentary.

2010! All these old columns are yours, except Europa. Attempt no landings there.

I Can Haz Dream? (1/18/10)

Hey, look, the random theme week generator pulled up a random theme day! Specifically, Martin Luther King Jr. day from two years ago, which, as you all plus one inexplicable e-mailing defender of Uruguayan soccer players knows all too well, is when I poke through the news for stories about racism.

In what is either a stunning indictment of human society or my unoriginality, the results included sports (Tennessee football instead of British football), drug testing of welfare recipients (two years later, still a cause celebre amongst the "class warfare is wrong" Republican crowd, and, Australian soccer with a side order of fried chicken, a bit that still cracks me up.

FUN FACT: There's a bit about a racist swim club in there too, and just this year, there was a bit about a "Whites Only" sign at a pool. What the fuck, swimming? Hasn't Newt Gingrich taught you how to be subtly racist yet?

Bananas En La Cabeza (5/17/10)

Oh, right. The Cheney-led initiative to brand Obama as soft on terror by demonizing the idea of reading people their rights when they're arrested. That was a thing for a couple of months. Well, Obama showed them, didn't he?

Guantanamo's still open, he signed the indefinite detentions bill, and he assassinated an American citizen accused of terrorism with a drone strike. The plans for civilian trials of terror suspects went nowhere. And thanks to that, two years later, nobody even thinks about whether people the American government accuses of terrorism have Miranda rights. Or any other rights, for that matter. Good thing we all took Dick and Liz Cheney's advice!

FUN FACT: Nine times out of ten, when confronted with the word "Miranda", I will make a Carmen Miranda joke.