Archive - Nov 15, 2013

Farewell, "Historical Burn"

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Memo to the American Viewing Public, gaming nerds, and David Barton: YOU ARE DUMB.

As we come to the close of another week, I find the balance in the research pile has inexplicably shifted from small stuff to big stuff. So it's time to mostly turn to pop culture and entertainment tidbits, with a touch of the crazy as dessert, for this week's SPASTIC TOPIC MONKEY FRIDAY!

Last night marked the final new episode of Totally Biased with W. Kamau Bell on FXX, and that's a damn shame. The show, which was reasonably successful as a weekly show on the original FX, did admittedly struggle a bit out of the gate coming up with four days worth of comedy where they used to have one, but so does Jon Stewart, some weeks.

Now, if the reported viewership numbers are correct, I can't exactly blame FXX for the move, although moving it to a network a lot of people don't get, then putting it up opposite The Daily Show, couldn't have helped. But I think another part of it is, well, America. It's not that Totally Biased was political. People watch political. And it wasn't that it had gay people. People watch gay people. And it wasn't that it was full of people of color. People watch that too. But it was all those things, and more. There were basically two straight white dudes on the show, and one of them was TV's Frank. Nothing really looked or sounded like it on TV, so we should be irritated that it's gone.

The Playstation 4 comes out today. You may want one. I certainly want one. I mean, I'm not in any hurry. It's not a launch lineup that screams "Spend hundreds of dollars NOW". But I still want one.

And I want an XBox One eventually, too. And I like my WiiU. And I don't really care what resolution the games run at on the respective machines, and I don't really care about the technical details, and more importantly, neither should you. Because you may or may not realize this, but now, at the end of the last generation of games, looking back, every single fucking thing people argued about? Nobody gives a shit.

People bought Playstations and they bought Xboxen and they bought Wiis and yes only a few of us bought WiiU's but Nintendo seems outwardly unconcerned. Nobody won, nobody lost, everyone just played a bunch of video games. As it is now, so it has been, back to when Colecovision sported a better version of Donkey Kong than the shoddy 2600 port.

Stop arguing. Spend that time coming up with more clever things to shout into your headset than "faggot". Be incrementally better people for a change.

And finally, a message from frequent occupant of this space, David Barton, psycho evangelist and inexplicable participant in American politics: GLOBAL WARMING IS REAL.

"A door has been opened and we have said, you know, we embrace a wicked policy. Okay, then I’ll take my hand of protection off your nation, and whap! Here comes storms like we’ve never seen before, and here comes floods, and here comes climate stuff that we can’t explain all the hot times and all the cold times and too much rain and not enough rain and we’re flooding over here and we’ve got droughts over here."

Science says carbon traps heat. David Barton says sins like abortion trap heat because God is angry at us. And in America, that's called a "lively debate" that results in us "teaching the controversy". Whap!