Archive - Jul 2015

July 16th

The Politics Of Duncing

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Memo to TLC, Jeb Bush and Son, and Iran critics: YOU ARE DUMB.

Mass media, the intersection of politics and the investment class, and international diplomacy. Sure, these all sound like big, serious concepts, but on SPASTIC TOPIC MONKEY FRIDAY, any and all of them can be reduced to me calling a bunch of dumbfucks names until I feel slightly better about the state of the world. Bring on the dumbfucks!

TLC has officially cancelled "19 Kids and Counting", on account of that whole "oldest of the 19 kids molesting four of the others" thing, in what seemed like an obvious decision to the rest of us months ago but was apparently a challenge for TLC executives. Or at least, that's what they're saying publicly, that they spent the time in "thoughtful consideration" and are apparently making a documentary about molestation with the cooperation of the Duggars. I'm sure it'll air right after their documentary about deceptive video editing with the participation of James O'Keefe.

I, of course, am a cynic, so I'm betting that most of those six weeks were spent wrangling out contractual obligations, with some extra consideration given to the fact that if they'd cancelled it right away, they'd turn the Duggars into conservative martyrs, whereas now, the story becomes largely a footnote. Sure, the Duggars still have their defenders screaming "Jesus forgives mistaks" and "Lena Dunham" as if those things were relevant, but there's no way it'll coalesce into a movement now. Which is a shame, because if it had, we would have gotten to watch more prominent Republicans than Mike Huckabee trying to gracefully defend incest.

And now, as a special Friday treat, possibly the worst paragraph that will be written during hte entire 2016 presidential campaign, courtesy the Washington Post:

"In a recent interview, Jeb Bush Jr., the candidate’s son and former business partner, said they’re both 'nerdy tech guys' who once talked to Google about investing in driverless cars — a growing field of research and investment in Silicon Valley."

And you thought the word "nerdy" couldn't be devalued any more than it already had? HA HA HA HA HA. Also, is there anything more Republican than the phrase "Jeb Bush. Jr., son and former business partner?" Yeah, that's some hard work and bootstraps right there. I'm sure Google was champing at the bit to maybe have these self-made men invest in their robocars. Because, being Google, they need the money.

And finally, Iran. As a complete non-expert in geopolitics and diplomacy, and with limited access to the details of the actual deal, I have no idea whether or not the Iran negotiations led to something good or something bad.

All I have to go on is the fact that every single person saying it's bad is a war-hungry nutjob with an overly-simplistic view of Iranian society who, even if that weren't true, would object to the deal on the grounds that diplomacy is for pussies and anyway Obama did it. So, you know. On that basis, I'm willing to extend at least tentative support.