The Moron Protocol

« October 2017 »

Memo to the media: IT MEANS HE’S A MORON.

What’s interesting in what is now two or three weeks of fallout from reports that Rex Tillerson called Donald Trump a fucking moron is that all the discussion has been around, shall we say, the process. Has Tillerson denied saying it? Will he deny saying it? What does this mean for the relationship between the president and his secretary of state?

The discussion of process is how the media avoids wrangling with the real issue. And the real issue is how do we, as a country, deal with the fact that we’ve elected a moron. A moron that everyone except the moron knows is a moron.

Even after it was revealed that Tillerson’s comment was prompted by a meeting where Trump was shown a chart showing how many nukes we’ve had over time, and Trump saw the line going down, and he thought lines going down were bad, and so he asked why we don’t have more nukes, it came with this weird “he’s a moron like a fox” aspect. The line is that Trump constantly asking people what the fuck is going on isn’t because he doesn’t know what the fuck is going on, it’s because he wants to keep people on their toes and get them to “think outside the box”.

I’d argue that in 2017, trying to get people to “think outside the box” is just further proof that Trump is a moron who hasn’t had a management book read to him since 1988. But more importantly, nobody actually believes that’s what Trump’s doing. They’re just saying that because the alternative is admitting, publicly, that the President of the United States is a fucking moron.

And it has to be deliberate, because it’s so fucking obvious. Yesterday’s impromptu press event was yet another off-script shit-show, and the worst I heard about it was that it had “strange moments”. Here’s one strange moment. ACTUAL QUOTE TIME!

”I don't know if he did. No, no, no. I was -- I was told that he didn't often, and a lot of presidents don't. They write letters. TRUMP: I do -- excuse me, Peter. I do a combination of both. Sometimes it's -- it's a very difficult thing to do, but I do a combination of both. President Obama, I think, probably did sometimes, and maybe sometimes he didn't. I don't know. That's what I was told. All I can do -- all I can do is ask my generals. Other -- other presidents did not call, they'd write letters. And some presidents didn't do anything.”

That was how Trump responded to a reporter calling him on his blatant lie that Obama didn’t talk to the families of dead soldiers. He dropped that lie after being criticized for not contacting the families of the four soldiers killed recently in Niger. He also said that he’d written letters and they were totally done they just hadn’t been sent yet, which I’m sure everyone believed.

I had to go digging for a full transcript for that quote, by the way, because the versions I found in stories omitted the dumb, stumbling parts that make Donald Trump sound like the fucking moron that he is. You know, the liberal media.

We’re all going to have to come to grips with electing a moron eventually. Since we seem incapable of doing it in the face of constant evidence and rank incompetence, I guess we’ll have to wait until the destruction in his wake affects someone we can collectively agree “matters”.