Containing The Worst People

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Memo to White Men's Rights Advocates: KEEP FIGHTING THE POINTLESS FIGHT.

I've poked around this idea before, but I don't think I've stated it outright. And it's important to know that when I rank human beings on the planet based on the group they self-organize into, I rate "men's rights activists" as the worst motherfuckers on the planet.

Of course, it's important to keep in mind that I define the MRA movement differently than the MRA does. That's because all too often, these assholes need the thinnest of veneers of plausible deniability to maintain a sort of perceived respectability, and thus frequently claim that their hissyfits over gender (and race) equality are hissyfits over something else.

So here's a quick guide to know whether someone is MRA or not. If someone says it's about ethics in game journalism, they're in. If they use the phrase "Social Justice Warrior" as a deliberate, unironic insult, they're in. If someone's argument boils down to basic anger that anyone other than straight white dudes are getting attention, because the only reason anyone other than straight white dudes WOULD get attention is because of political correctness, affirmative action, and the warring of social justice, they're in.

Another fun trait of the movement is to pick fights on very small battlefields so that their dicks look bigger relative to it. For example, "Gamergate" started because one indie game by one non-male indie game developer got more positive attention than the white dudes thought it deserved. Which brings us to the Hugos.

The Hugos are awards given out every year at one serious science fiction convention. Worldcon has, over multiple decades, grown to somewhere between five and ten percent of the size of last year's San Diego Comicon. This is not an evaluation of relative worth, mind you. It's just a fact. Worldcon is for the hardcore. and the hardcore ain't for everyone. So WorldCon is small. And the Hugos are small. Which is why a couple of splinter groups from the Men's Rights movement tried to hijack them.

The groups, which call themselves "Sad Puppies" out of accidental self-awareness and "Rabid Puppies" because the "Sad Puppies" weren't militant enough, organized and games the nomination process, filling the ranks with the works of their own, works they insisted must be better than the usual types of stuff nominated because they sold more copies and were written by conservative white dudes.

But they couldn't hijack the actual voting, and faced with several categories filled with wingnut drivel with lasers in it, the Hugo voters went with "No Award" instead. Which of course is evidence of a conspiracy and the Puppies are claiming simultanious victory over and victimization from the Social Justice Warrior Hugos or something. I didn't get too deep into it, because as I mentioned above, these people are the worst. They combine everything that's wrong with rampant sexists, white supremacists, and most importantly, nerds. To pay attention to them for too long is to gaze into the mouth of madness. Eventually you're going to fail your sanity check.

What happened at the Hugos isn't really important. What is important is what happens in the future. And that's why I'd like the hardcore Worldcon nerds to take one for the team and essentially, evacuate the Hugos. Leave a skeleton crew behind to put up a pretend fight, but use the Hugos as a honeypot to keep the Men's Right's movement occupied. Contain them, give them enough of a pretend fight that they'll keep frothing and gnashing, and point and laugh at them from a distance. It's the only way to be sure.

Then just use the Saturns for your serious awards. Trust me. I know there's history, and I know there's tradition, but take it from someone who's been an SF nerd his entire life. That shit's redundant. You don't need Hugo's AND Saturns. Just cut the Saturn categories in half, then replace half of what's left with book stuff. Everybody wins except the Men's Rights assholes, who can be easily tricked into a perpetual state of almost-winning-and-therefore-vindicated-by-martyrdom, because they're fucking idiots.

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