You Are Dumb, which is not a blog, posts new columns every weekday, except for most Tuesdays and the occasional fuckbotch. It is also a Twitter feed, @youaredumb, with content in a similar vein but much shorter. For a take on what a blog by me would be like, check out OLDNERD.
Memo to Marco Rubio and Steve King: YOU ARE SORT OF RIGHT, AND STILL DUMB.
So, pope. Pope over here, pope over here, pope fucking everywhere, Pope Francis is visiting America, and if you don't know that by now, you haven't walked past a TV in days. I don't believe the Pope is infallible, but he sure as fuck is inescapable.
But it's the infallibility thing that brings us here today. See, for a couple of decades, the right was perfectly happy to allow the Pope to go around telling everyone what to do. This is because what the Pope wanted to tell people to do was what social conservatives wanted to tell people to do. Don't be gay. Don't have premarital sex. Don't use birth control. Don't have abortions.
But now that Pope Francis has added "don't be such rich assholes" and "don't maybe destroy the planet", and "be nice to immigrants" to the list, suddenly, Republicans are perfectly happy saying that sometimes you don't have to do what the Pope says. And you know what? I'm fine with that.
Sure, it's hypocritical. But so was every Catholic who ever took an estrogen pill or put on a condom. This pope is a better pope than most popes, but he's still a fucking pope, and just because he doesn't like it, it doesn't mean that Francis doesn't live in a gold-plated independent city-state built off the backs of one of the greatest long cons in human history. You wanna disobey the pope for your own personal benefit? Go right ahead.
But a look at HOW some of these fuckers go around claiming they don't have to listen to the papal decrees on global warming, income equality, and immigration are very telling. Here's how noted Catholic Marco Rubio justified his apostasy on Fox News' "Special Report". ACTUAL QUOTE TIME!
"On moral issues, he speaks with incredible authority. He’s done so consistently on the value of life, on the sanctity of life, on the importance of marriage and on the family. On economic issues, the pope is a person.”
See what he did there? When a pope agrees with Republicans, specifically social conservatives, he's speaking from a position of infallible moral authority. When he DISAGREES with Republicans, well, those aren't issues of morality. There's no morality in eoonomics! There's no mention of income inequality, interest rates, or poverty in the Bible, so when Francis says something in that arena, he's as easy to ignore as Paul Krugman!
But when it somes to the shameless denial of reality in order to justify ignoring a pope who isn't a complete monster, it's going to be tough to top America's Stupid Congresscritter, Steve King, who explained why the pope was full of shit on immigration:
“One thing the Catholic Church seems to miss is the importance of the nation-state, of sovereignty, and if you’re going to protect the rule of law, you have to have borders and have to have the nation state,“ - King, on CNN.
Um, I hate to break it to you, but when it comes to sovereignty and the nation state, the Catholic Church happens to be the only religion that has both. They've got nearly a century of experience with running a sovereign nation state. A small one, but I think Steve King would agree that having a small one is apparently no impediment to claiming expertise on a variety of subjects.
Ignore popes all you want. But it's because you don't wanna, not because you're applying clear, long-standing principles on the limits of papal authority. You just found your birth control, and it's getting rich, picking on brown people, and destroying the environment.