Wingnut Revolution

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Let's Put On A Show!

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Memo to the Uni-Teabaggers: YOUR ATTEMPT WAS SEMI-VALIANT.

So, this weekend, the Tea Party movement tried to increase the number on its "__ Days Without A Racially-Motivated Incident" sign by one. They hosted the first of what they claim will be a number of "Uni-Tea" rallies, designed to show that the Tea Party is open and welcoming to any race, creed, or sexual orientation.

And to a certain extent, they're right. The Tea Party is first and foremost not about race, it's about ignorance. Sure, a lot of that ignorance comes out as blatant racism, but there's no reason that ignorance can't take other forms, like delusional self-hatred, excusing racism on ideological grounds, or pretending that racial blame-shifting isn't actually racist.

Unfortunately, Uni-Tea has the same problem the rest of the Tea Party has with racism. They don't acknowledge what everybody knows, that the Tea Party attracts a whole bunch of fucking redneck shitkickers who hate Barack Obama because of the color of his skin. If they did that, then maybe they could move beyond it. But if they did that, they'd lose the support of the shitkickers, and that'd diminish their numbers significantly. Something else the Tea Party has in common with the GOP.

Let's keep in mind why there has to be a Uni-Tea rally in the first place. The NAACP criticized the Tea Party for not denouncing the racism within its ranks. The media paid attention and made it a story, which led to the Breitbart/Sherrod thing. But one other thing happened around the same time. Mark Williams, head of the Tea Party Express, went fucking apeshit all over cable news and his blog. ACTUAL QUOTE TIME!

"You’re dealing with people who are professional race baiters, who make a very good living off this kind of thing. They make more money off of race than any slave trader ever. It’s time groups like the NAACP went to the trash heap of history where they belong with all the other vile racist groups that emerged in our history." - Williams, on NPR.

He expressed similar sentiments on CNN, made extensive use of the "Colored" in NAACP to write a parody on his blog, blamed every racist sign and incident at Tea Party rallies by infiltrators trying to make the teabaggers look bad, and was eventually kicked out of the Tea Party by the Tea Party Federation, which apparently has whatever limited jurisdiction exists over who does and does not get to be a teabagger.

So anyway, after Mark Williams made the non-racist Tea Party look bad by going on a series of racist tirades that rival Mel Gibson in every way except references to sucking Mel Gibson's dick, they decided to hold a rally to show how inclusive they were.

Of course, they showed that inclusiveness by including Andy Breitbart. Who proceeded to join a bunch of other speakers in blaming all racism on the left, who oppress minorities by pointing out how they're being oppressed all the time. This is what people outside the Tea Party call "missing the point", and what people inside the Tea Party call "if only those dumb, ignorant minorities would realize how great we'd be for them and join us."

Anyway, reports showed that only 500 baggers in the Philly area were interested in unity at all. And I'm guessing a good half of those only showed up because someone made sure they'd get community service credit for it. Oh, and they also got some minorities... somewhere between one and two whole dozen. But that's OK, because as David Webb, the man who made the call that Mark Williams was too racist for the Tea Party, pointed out:

"I didn't realize that any movement everywhere had a minimum daily requirement of black people to be legitimate." Man, he really is a dyed-in-the-wool conservative. He never misses an opportunity to create a strawman "quota" system and knock it down.

Having minorities in your midst doesn't automatically make you legitimate, it's true. It's just that the more minorities you have in the crowd, the lower the odds are that one of them will be comfortable carrying, or marching near, a sign that shows Barack Obama with a fucking bone through his nose. It's not a quota, it's just statistics.

But you won't get that, because the first step is admitting you have a problem, and that's certainly something Andrew Breitbart has never understood.

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