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Lazy Twitter Week II: Day Three

« June 2014 »

Memo to the hundred and forty first character: YOU ARE DUMB.

We're into one of these content lulls again, where the things that are happening are such retreads of the kinds of thing that are always happening that I can't find any hook in them to even pretend I'm saying new things. So, since it's been a full nine months since I pulled this, so we're going to do the second ever Lazy Twitter Week. The way this works is, each day, I spend the day cranking out tweets based on the news of the day and then the next day I compile them here for those of you who don't read the Twitter account. And today there's a picture!

The biggest discrepancy in US politics is between what Obama’s done on guns and what people think Obama’s done on guns.

Donald Sterling suing the NBA means more Donald Sterling saying stuff on the record, and that’s a win for everyone except, well, Sterling.

Rick Perry, trying to get a Tesla plant built in Texas, drove an electric car in California. How are they not impeaching him?

OTOH, the picture of Perry in sunglasses getting out of the Model S is so douchey I have to assume he’s secretly trying to destroy Tesla.

Bobby Bottleservice's cousin, Bobby Publicservice, and his eee-lektrik car!

It's the personification of tipping the valet a single dollar coin.

"Yeah, let's go with the waistcoat and borrow sunglasses from my 37-year-old intern who thinks he's still 29."

I lovehate this picture so much it'll be worth the hassle getting it into the column tomorrow. (UPDATE: Yes, it totally was.)

One more. "Does Texas have a Mafia, and does that Mafia have a Steve Jobs? That's the direction I'm leaning."

Nice to see that the all-encompassing list of “things the Internet can be shitty about” encompasses “woman breastfeeding at her graduation”.

“Boehner and the Brat” sounds like an 80s sitcom or a Morning Zoo crew.

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